Animaniacs: Top Ten Sexually Active Animals

When you were a kid, the idea of animal sex was as pristine as the normal “boy meets girl” scenario. It’s a sentimental encounter where lovers meet each other at the right place and at the right time, make babies and rear their young.

The idea of sexual sadism, masochism, the Kama Sutra, role-playing, gay sex, masturbation or any other risqué sexual activities are thought to be strictly human, or are they?

Here are the top ten sexually active animals that put the word “wild” in wildlife.

10. Sea Horses

Studies conducted by the Sea Life Center aquariums in Britain suggest that out of the 3,168 sea horse sexual encounters that were recorded, 37 percent of these encounters were a variant of gay sex.

The Seahorse

Scientists were able to identify two specific breeds of seahorses that engage in bisexual behavior. These are the Australian seahorses and the Caribbean slender seahorses. These two breeds were observed flirting with 25 potential partners each day. The only species of seahorse that remained faithful to their respective partners was the British spiny seahorse.

Children’s science books already have revealed that seahorses are not new to being “gay”. These species of fish belong to the family “Syngnathidae” which means, in layman’s terms, "the males get pregnant." Other animal species that belong to this group are the pipe fish and the leafy sea dragon.

09. Ducks

Many male birds have no sexual organ because most of them only have holes to deposit their sperm in. However, one bird stands out from the crowd because it’s well-hung. The males of the duck family have big, cork-screw sexual organs.

What’s strange about the duck is not the male penis, but the story behind the evolution of the vagina of their female counterparts. The duck vagina is perhaps the most complicated animal genitalia because of its many labyrinthian oviducts with some tunnels leading to dead-ends.

The Male Ducks looking for Girls

In a normal scenario, a female duck will commit to just one male. However, other males are known to attack a sexually-mature female and there are instances when a female duck is even killed by the sexual activity.

These forced-matings resulted in the evolutionary marvel that is the duck’s vagina. The females can use their vagina to isolate the sperm coming from the forced-matings and shoot the sperm back out later. Thanks to their complicated oviducts, there’s only a 5% chance for the female ducks to be fertilized by “duck rape”.

08. Angler Insertion

According to the Spice Girls, making love is “two becoming one”. No animal in the world

The Angry Angler

understands this better than the angler fish. If you remember the movie “Finding Nemo”, the angler fish is the sea predator that had a glowing lure, like a mini light bulb, at the tip of its nose.

It’s difficult for the male antler to find a female because sea predators are commonly spread out in the sea. When the male finally spots a female, he bites her hard and pierces her skin to inserts himself and literally holds on for his entire life. In the event that the female has eggs that need to be fertilized, the male will provide his semen anytime.

Scientists used to be baffled to find leech-like parasites that cling on the angler fish that they catch. It’s actually the male angler engaged in the ultimate sex act.

07. Naughty Nautilus

Is it possible to have intimate sex from a distance? Not for humans, but it’s normal for the male paper nautilus!

When a male spots a female that’s receptive to his charms he will swim away and avoid the female. For humans, that’s like walking away from a possible score. For the nautilus, it’s game time!

A Male Nautilus

The male nautilus’s tentacle, that bears sperm, will involuntarily detach from the body of the male. The tentacle would swim towards the female to penetrate her. Yes, it’s like a detachable swimming penis.

Until today, scientists were baffled how this peculiar sex arrangement took place among the nautilus species. One theory is that the female nautilus still has a molluscan shell. Without an armor protecting the males, it’s less likely he can get close to the tough, normally aggressive female, hence the launch of the swimming penis.

06. Stag Party

The red deer, also known as an Elk, is native species of Britain. The most notable feature of this animal is its long antlers that can reach up to a total of two meters in width. These animals are also famous for their infectious, lingering calls before the winter season. These calls are so loud that they can be heard from far-reaching distances.

The Male Deer

Scientists have observed that it only takes a few seconds for stags to reach a full, enormous erection, especially when they rub their antlers against the long grass. The antlers, covered in fur, are very erogenous zones. The soft fur is also known as velvet.

The velvet actually helps safeguard the newly formed antlers of young males during springtime. This means that the adolescent red deer, while growing antlers, are beyond horny. They get a kick out of it, gaining full blown erections the more they rub their antlers against the objects around them.

05. Kinky K-9’s

He is in charge

Female dogs seem to have a very effective way of holding on to their partners. They have huge muscles inside their vaginas that grip the male dog’s penis during sexual intercourse. This ensures that the male dog won’t be going anywhere until his sperm fertilizes the female’s egg. This interlocking of genitals can last for as long as 30 minutes.

What’s amazing about this is the female dog usually ignores the fact that a male dog is attached to her tail end. She goes about her normal routine and eats, sleeps and walks around while a male is precariously being dragged behind her.

04. Snake Love

For some animals, having one sexual organ is not enough, they have to have two. This is the case of many snakes and lizards.

The male snake had to develop a cunning evolutionary strategy for mating, because female snakes are hard-skinned and there is no lubricant is at his disposal. The male snake penetrates the coarse females with their unique erection.

Gorgeous Skinned Snake

Unlike most animals, where the penis grows large and the male tries to fit it into the vagina, the male’s penis is kept ”inside-out” called “Hemi Peres” or “half penises”. With the proper timing, the penis unrolls into the female’s oviduct and inflates like the long narrow balloons used by clowns for balloon animals.

When the first penis discharges its sperm, the second penis pops out to prolong the activity.

03. Black Widows

Some insects have an identical definition of pain and pleasure. Examples of insects that are into such extreme sexual behavior are spiders, bees and mantises.

Black Widow

The female preying mantis is known to bite the head off of the male partner during sexual intercourse. The body of the male mantis still has such a strong sex drive that it continues to hump the female even with a decapitated head. This notorious female behavior ensures that she gets a nourishing meal so she is strong enough to raise her babies.

Queen bees save the sperm of her sexual partners for her entire life. The queen fertilizes her self throughout her life to produce a steady stream of bees to sustain the hive.

Some male spiders are able to escape the larger females after sex. In many cases, the female will catch the escaping male to eat him up. It’s the most extreme way to pay for sex.

02. Make Love, Not War

The world of Bonobo chimpanzees is like Sodom and Gomorrah. Sex shapes the social life of these animals. They have been observed engaging kissing and hugging while some masturbate when they win disputes. Many of them like to mate "doggy-style” and sometimes perform sporadic fellatio with each other and in some cases, even auto-fellatio.

The Bonobo Chimpanzee

Bonobo’s express their excitement in sexual ways. Adult females rub genitals with each other. The males rub their genitals against the buttocks of another male, which is called “pseudocopulation”. Some males practice “penis-fencing”, while hanging from a branch; they clutch and swing their erect penises against each other.

Scientists believe that this behavior of the Bonobo’s is their normal way of saying hello and avoiding conflicts.

01. Slug Feast

Slugs are classified as hermaphroditic animals; they have both the male and female organs. This means that the slug’s mating habits are nowhere near mundane.

The freakiest sexual behavior is done by Spotted-leopard slugs, sometimes known as Great Grey slugs or Tiger slugs. When reproducing, these slugs suspend themselves from thick rope-like mucus that entwines the slug’s bodies. While hanging from the slimy rope, the slugs force out their blue, gigantic penises that wrap around each other and ejaculate to exchange genetic material.

An Active Slug

During the sex act, the slugs’ penises get entangled around each other. To free themselves from the grip, the slugs will proceed to literally chew and eat away the penises so that they can disengage. That’s perhaps the most extreme BDSM (Bondage, Sadism and Masochism) act in the entire animal kingdom.

Animals also get “freaky” with each other or with themselves. They also have fetishes. They masturbate; they have a thriving gay community. Some rape the females while some engage in a lot of casual sex. Perhaps, this is why humans call voluptuous sex symbols “vixens”. In fact, if you hear a wolf or fox howling at night, there is a great chance it’s busy having mind-blowing sex.